20 YEARS OF BREATHING

People come and go..a very few of them stay in your thoughts. Expectations, failures, dreams, dissatisfactions..they just form half of your world, rest is YOU, Just you nothing else. YOU, inside the hollow body with nothing but an open sky, air and this so minimized but vast earth. You may run, you can pretend or you can do both, even if you don't, you feel the lack of them. But when you know that you deserve better, there is no stopping you. But with everything moving around so fast don't forget to feed the YOU that's inside the hollowness. Chase the stars, watch your steps and breathe..in this heterogeneous society you may find yourself talking to people or you may not but let them not decide the parameters of your personality. Just because you are not good at talking to them doesn't mean you are good for nothing.. it's Ok if you don't show how you value them..those, who want to know you, will eventually know you.. Don't curse yourself, don't transgress yourself, don't stop breathing..

SANDCASTLES AND STORIES..

  Another beach..Another sand castle..which has another story of it's own. Story of a princess or a knight..of dream or may be of love..of childhood or of friendship..of loneliness or of a quest.. isn't is all about stories?? Everything has a story of it's own. In fact, we all have stories..Stories that we are living, stories that we all were once a part of, stories that we could have been a part of, stories that we want to be a part of, stories that we are never going to be a part of and stories, that are always waiting for us. What makes the difference is the story that we choose to be a part of, and the climax that it leads to. So go ahead..create your own version of story and choose a good one!!

LEARN TO LIVE AND LIVE TO LEARN..

                                                           Life changes...with every step that you take, with every decision that you make, with every place that you travel, with every thought that germinate in your mind, it may change in few seconds. The people whom you thought will always be there, are sometimes repelled by your shadow. You meet new people, you meet different different souls. Some of them touch your soul and sometimes you touch some people's soul. The people without whom you thought your life would be incomplete, you learn to live without them. Sometimes you become a person you never believed you would be or you become someone whom you hated to be. What you thought is not what you think now. You gradually evolve. And evolving is not a bad thing. It's good. It's good to change. It's good to be a different version of yourself, not necessarily a better version because if you have not degraded yourself you cannot feel the need to be upgraded. It's never too late to rectify. So, the point is Learn To Live And Live To Learn, enjoy the pattern. Life is somewhere in between this process. Have a life. It's good

NEW YEAR BUT NOT SO NEW THOUGHTS

                                                                     last year passed and i couldn't even say goodbye to it properly. That's so not me, I was supposed to write how was the year and write the last page of my journal for the last time. But i didn't. It's not that i did it knowingly but still i did. May be I've changed may be i haven't, may be it was just a regular thing but now that i am thinking about it too much it's starting to mean different things. But may be it was okay, it was okay to not do thing that you usually do. It's good to do things differently. It doesn't mean that you are not going to do that thing ever again, it just means that some things don't remain the same forever (forever is a lie though). And it's ok.

INCOMPLETE

Why trusting is so hard
Why decisions terrify us
Why love is so ugly
Why memories shatter us
Why trying is so difficult
Why words confuse us
Why roads are broken
Why freedom scares us
Why talking is so
Why dreams break us
Why it looks complete
But still it's so incomplete

If it's bad for you, it's worse for her/him

                             I thought it's tough for me. But NO....it's tougher for her. It always was...I was just busy questioning WHY ME???? and complaining, thinking that i am the only one suffering like every other human being without realizing She is the one in pain all this while. She is the one tolerating it for a longer period. She is the one who was introduced to it before me. Like they say when people are always with us we start taking them for granted, may be that's what i did even if i didn't want to..Sometimes we realize when that very person leaves us or sometimes when rest of the people leave us,that's when we notice the only one remaining with us. I never stopped loving her but my priority changed. Now that i realize She is my top most priority i realize that she is bruised. And those scars were there for years, neither did anybody notice nor she showed. She just said it so casually that you would mistaken it for a regular conversation. But because i know that voice and i know the intensity of that sound i know the intensity of the storm that is compressed inside her. I just try to make her life little bit easier if not the whole of it. I know she is strong enough...It's just that i don't want to see her like this. I obviously cannot express but what i can do is be there for her and support in whatever way i can. You are not the only one who's suffering there are a lot of people who are in worse condition. Be kind, help people in whatever way you can because sometimes we actually help ourselves while we hell others. Stop asking the same "why me" because it's not just you It's the way Life is.. For some it's bad and for some it's worse. Hold each other's hand and live through the storm.

Trying to comprehend

                      I saw him sitting in his home today...he was silent like his usual self.But there was certain darkness...like a cloud or something, but it seemed normal as that is his normal state. Later I got to know that he has lost his relative. I have never seen him sad or sympathetic towards someone. He is always busy being rude. But I feel sad for him. I don't know whether he is feeling that way or it's just another thing for him, as I have never seen that kind of side of him. But may be I am feeling what he should feel. Even if he is not feeling something, now that I look at him it's dark. Or may be he is not feeling anything actually. But how can a person not feel something?? It's true that, that's how he is. No signs of emotions..yeah! He laughs..yeah! He gets angry but never Sensitive..neither for someone nor for some situation. Today when I look at him he is serious as usual. I don't know if there is a storm inside him or it's just the usual sea. But what I know is I feel bad and at the same time again what I don't know is it's for him or for his loss